IT’S NOT THE BURDENS THAT BREAK YOU, IT’S HOW YOU CARRY THEM ~ UNKNOWN
I’m 41 and off work about a month and a half recovering from minor foot surgery. Life is good….. much needed time off from work. Not the way I would like to be off work, but off none the same. Much rather be on some place exotic…Bora Bora….Fiji….Belize…ok, a girl can dream right??? Hell, I’d even take a cabin in the Grand Teton’s with a cozy fire. The calm of the endless sky over Jackson Hole, Wyoming would be a welcome sight of serenity. I digress…back to my journey in reality here in Indiana…..
Time flies…even if you aren’t having fun. Time for my annual mammogram, again. I didn’t think much of it. I like the Breast Care Center, it is so comfy and like home. Ok, well more like a soap opera home décor wise…but plush, calm, inviting. Such a nice waiting area, friendly staff full of smiles, and coffee or tea while you wait….how great is that.? Just not looking forward to smashing my boobs in those cold fiberglass plates. Hold your breath, just a little more…little more…ok. Only takes a few minutes. No problem, I got this. I go, do my thing. No worries – on with life. But wait, a few days later, a call…it’s “the voice” with that question…”can you come in for an ultrasound and further images?” What…ummm…what? It’s the holiday weekend, I don’t have time for this. Ok, when, yes September 4th, I can do that. See you then. Wednesday comes around…once again I find myself in that lavish waiting room with big comfy chairs, plush couches, chess, magazines, coffee and tea. Waiting…but this time I am nervous. Hurry up, I need to get this done..what is taking so long? Waiting. Ten minutes seems like an eternity and I am called back, finally. But the Nurse is pleasant, she likes my orange spiky hairdo. She is nice, puts me at ease. She has cute pink shoes. I want some too. Pictures are done and now it’s time for the ultrasound. I lay on the table, that cold ultrasound jelly oozes all over my boob…yuck. click click click goes the magic ultrasound wand. Images upon images are taken…click click click, this can’t be good, can it..?? click click…………..click…………click click….. wait, why did she slow down…click….why is she making notes…click….this can’t be good. What happened to the fast zippity doo click click click…??
Ok, we will call you with the results by Friday. Bye. Friday can’t come fast enough…hurry up and wait. UGH!!!! UGH UGH UGH!!!
Friday….ring, ring ring….Hello? Yes, this is she…ok, what? Come in and talk to the radiologist? why? ok. Do a biopsy? Ok.
Wednesday again..September 11, 2013..laying on the table….that darn oozing jelly…ick…..hold my hand it may sting a little…the radiologist takes 11 samples of tissue from my right breast guided through the ultrasound. It wasn’t to bad…I mean, I have 10 tattoos, what can be worse than that…?? they laugh at me as I keep good humor through it all. Joan, the nurse holding my hand was so nice and pleasant trying to keep me calm. “All done” she says, “you did great”. There is a small area at the 10 o’clock position of my right breast. It showed up as a bright spot on the ultrasound. The densities have markedly changed from last year. That was all that click….click……click. Results should be back by Friday…we will call you.
I have come to hate Wednesdays and Friday. Stupid hump day.
Hurry up and wait…..wait wait WAIT!!! NO–I need to know NOW !!!
Ring…ring….Hello?? Yes, this is she. what? yes…I can come in to talk. Wait..what is going on?? yes….I can come in Friday.
Sean and I go to see the radiologist that Friday.